Being a wife, mother, having a career in a demanding legal field while being a content creator is absolutely exhausting. I constantly feel like I’m being pulled in different directions and have different roles to play in each direction. I have always been a perfectionist and push myself every day to be productive and strive to be the “perfect” wife, mom, daughter, friend, person. I love to cook fancy meals for my family, make my husband happy & proud, be the caring & supportive mother to my 15 year old while being the sweet and cuddly “Mama” to my 3 year old. I like to have my house in order, to decorate, wear the stylish outfits with my hair and makeup “just so”. But it’s not only my personal life that I hold to this standard, I want the WORLD to be perfect. Watching the news, reading articles on current events, knowing there are people struggling that I know, or haven’t even met, can cause me a great deal of distress & inner turmoil. I wish I could “save the world” so to speak and I carry so much stress upon me and even the burden of others, that it can, and has, physically made me feel sick.
I’m the type of person who can’t relax if there are dishes in the sink or crumbs on the counter. I hold myself and honestly everyone around me to the highest standard and often become incredibly disappointed if I, or they, don’t make the mark. It’s just my personality, and although I am happy with my life and who I am, sometimes, I too, get burnt out. I work full time and I rarely schedule time for relaxing. I think of all the things I can accomplish in my free time, like film a hair tutorial, take photos in outfits for my Amazon Shop, or create content for brands. If I don’t use my free time “wisely” I get very frustrated and feel like a lazy failure. I will often talk negatively to myself and put so much pressure and unrealistic expectations on my everyday life. I push myself A LOT.
I have come to realize that it’s OK to take a day off, or even two. It’s OK to not be everything to everyone today, and tomorrow can wait. Relaxing doesn’t make me lazy, it’s necessary for my mental and physical health. The world will not stop if I take a day off, my sponsors will not abandon me if I don’t create content every single day. My true followers won’t desert me if I’m not constantly posting. My office work will still be there in the morning. Thank God for my amazing husband who helps me with the burdens of the household and encourages me to slow down while showing me every day that he appreciates and is proud of everything I do.
I’m still a mother, I’m still a wife, I’m still an experienced and skilled paralegal, I’m still a content creator and blogger. I’m not selfish for taking time away from life’s burdens, I’m still the ambitious, creative, go-getter that I always have been, but today and maybe even tomorrow, I’m taking a break; and you know what? It feels amazing. Take time for yourself, rest and regroup, because you can’t pour from an empty cup and the world needs you at your best.